Miracle of miracles, I have a moment to type at this time in the evening! Peach and my husband are picking up pizza and Mr. Snuggles just fell asleep in my arms after briefly nursing. (For once I don't have to try to memorize what I want to write about the moment I find myself at my computer again...inevitably the ideas fade, change and become less post-worthy as the time passes).
Before laying him in his crib, I managed to catch a glimpse of his peaceful face with the fading light through his window. There really is nothing quite as sweet, innocent, peaceful and endearing as this face. Every child has it, not just Mr. Snuggles and Peach, I know. As I lay him down, the weight of the day seemed to slowly dissipate. Today was somewhat unusual in that I spent the entire day with both kids running errands nearly the entire day. It is not unusual that I spend entire days with both as my dear husband works so hard on our new home. He also works hard at his professional job. Running errands to and fro takes on a hectic feel, one that I don't like most of the time. It is hard at times because I am never sure what sort of tantrums will be thrown let alone how I will react to them. After my last post, I was at home with Mr. Snuggles every day due to a mysterious virus that mainly caused fever (sometimes scary high, boo), some icky diarrhea and a random vomiting incident (random in that it only happened once at 2:30 in the morning). Luckily, today he was relatively fever free and his smiley self again. So each day this week, I had to juggle the needs at the professional job and the home job. I don't think I did the professional job very well. I am so far behind on emails, memos, planning events and the like that I get a nervous pit in my stomach each time I think about it. So instead I'll focus on my home job. I felt good as a mom more times than not this week as I proactively went to the pediatrician twice (just to be sure it wasn't anything serious), stayed up during the night with Mr. Snuggles as he fought the uncomfortable feelings that come with a fever, was vigilant about hand washing (please, Peach, don't get sick!), and helped Peach through a few undocumented sightings of monsters at 3 in the morning (the most popular time monsters come to our house, not sure about yours!).
Back to today. Peach had a doctor's appointment to check the tubes in her ears (looking good!) and then we went to get Halloween costumes. Each year since Peach was born, I've always thrown something together at the last minute and always been disappointed. Halloween is one of those holidays that I always want to get by cheap but then regret it. So, this year, I decided to not go dirt cheap but go inexpensive and scored some good deals on a ladybug and a monkey. Before getting said costumes, the three of us hung out in my car in the parking lot while Mr. Snuggles slept. Peach was so helpful and all around darling. We sorted through things in my purse, she helped decorate the interior of my car with stickers and she was in awe as I blew bubbles with gum. Following this nice little interlude, we went in the store to get costumes. Peach was once again so delightful and showed tremendous restraint while she picked up every Hello Kitty piece of merchandise placed just so by the register. I was amazed at her looking-but-put-back skills. And I was amazed at my resolve to not walk out of that store without saying Goodbye Kitty. I was calm, collected, affirming, and most of all focused on getting out in a patient manner. This does not always happen but I vowed I would remain composed and composed I was! Then on to the next store where Peach was to pick out her costume. A ladybug it was. There were also SO many distractions in this store! She was amazing! It was quite a treat to observe. The next few hours were packed with a quick lunch, a quicker walk back to the car and a pleasant hair cut for the sweet Peach at a new place. She was brave and intrigued by the man who spoke in a soft voice but whose body was anything but soft -- tall, built, full-of-tattoos, stark-blonde hair, holes the size of silver dollars in his ears and silver studs in his face. But, he was really nice and let my daughter watch Strawberry Shortcake! And the haircut was cheap, thankfully.
Back home after a long day, Mr. Snuggles nursed for a bit and then we all tried playing together. Sometimes this works beautifully and other times it (I?) royally screws up. I was not patient and did not plan ahead. I am not faulting myself (trying to be very understanding after a year or more of sleep deprivation and working full time) but just trying to look back and think how I could have done a tiny bit better. I yelled. (I hate yelling) and ended up refereeing a time out (I hate time out). So, it turned out OK and I stuck to my word that the privilege of going to the park was taken away because of talking back and hitting. Instead we just went on a walk, mainly because we all needed it! And the weather was perfect. The walk was good. The rest of the afternoon and evening went as it typically does. The difference was the end (or near the end). As I was rocking Mr. Snuggles, I realized there was a hint of magic....peace...je ne sais quoi.. I didn't feel completely spent (tired, yes) or that I was digging at the bottom of the barrel for some energy. For some reason, on this day of staying with my priorities exclusively (my children)!unlike other days doing the same (maybe because it was Friday?), I didn't have to choose to balance. I liked it. A lot.
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